xanthan gum

Kitty -- Seeing as this poem is freestyle, capital letters are not necessary. The uniform lowercase implies this system. My focus was meant to be on the stars' absense in ...

The French version reads beautifully. Simplicity is best pulled off with a language that is far from simple .. at least to those with English as a first language. Next ...

shriek -- Firstly, my gratitude is boundless. You have no idea how much this in-depth critique helped me to understand the foundations of my own style. For a while I've ...

cadmium: Spliced - split apart sliced - signs of abuse, cuts ShadowTwit: "full of" incest was an exaggeration. But Genesis 20: 11-12, Genesis 4: 26, Genesis 4: 3-8, Exod. 6: ...

I enjoyed it, but I don't think a "golden" mane, for example, suits the rest of the tone of this poem that - excepting that one word - you have ...

I back "child support" edit. Smiles are in voices, and I personally love it enough the way it is.

Since sugar is abstained from during Lent, the character's measuring symbolizes this holding back process, the simple salivating over these pleasures. Likewise, the bleeding of the stomach is somewhat

The quality improved throughout, and by the ending, I had been moved. Thank you.

It's a cigg, darling. Thanks for pointing out the break in rhythm, though.

Haha. [:

Coarse is a word, and it was used in proper context.

...you still have to cut "and".

Leave the terms, it's all beautiful. Ditch "tis". Otherwise - loved it. Your first stanza is your strongest.

Just dropped in to say that I love all the Greek allusions, and I'll get back to this.

...I apologize on the wording, I'll tweak it as much as possible -- you see, it's a quote from Homer's THE ODYSSEY =/